The Point of the Give (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 179)

 

Pretext Note: This passage begins with observations specifically related to dog behavior, but evolves into a greater message regarding instability and behavioral disorders in people. I sincerely believe this message is of vital importance in regards to anyone who suffers from mental instability and I continue to believe that such instability is primarily a product of a behavioral disorder (a nurtured or learned disorder) as opposed to a pure genetic or medically inherited disease. The parallels of comparative behavior across species are extremely useful in illustrating this theory (and tangential associated theories) in cause, effect, and successful resolution.

A dog raised in a home environment without appropriate structure and boundaries is a dog that has been over-nurtured (spoiled) into believing that it is the master or ruler or supreme authority of all. In the reality of such a situation, that “all” for the dog only applies to its own household (own isolated pack), yet the dog has no profound reason or understanding to interpret its supreme authority of being any less authoritative anywhere outside of its own home (isolated pack). It cannot differentiate the “norm” of its isolated pack as being different from the “norm” of the very different greater world which exists outside of its isolated pack. The dog is thus significantly unsocialized and will be untempered in its accurate interpretation of relational behavior that varies from the over-nurturing it has learned to accept as all that is right and proper for itself.

If we assume that no fear has been added into this developmental equation by the owners, and we take the dog illustrated above and plop him on an exam room table, directly in front of a stable dominant authority figure, the dog will first attempt to flee. If not allowed to flee and not sappily “rescued” by his over-nurturing parents/family, and he is continued to be restrained by the stable dominant authority figure appropriately, the next move of the dog will be to do everything within his power to ignore and negate the reality of the stable authority figure. The dog will try to turn its body away as much as possible and will literally look down or from side to side to avoid having to acknowledge the authority figure who stands before it. If the stable authority figure is persistent enough, they will then repetitively and commandingly make the dog face themselves while making direct eye contact until avoidance of the posture and the glance is relinquished indefinitely. That is the point of the “give” by the dog which signifies that the dog has yielded its supreme authority to another “pack leader” who is more dominant and stable than itself; to a stable dominance which does not become an adversarial force or despotic ruler per se, but a rational and balanced reactive force of structure, accountability, accurate perception, and healthy non-codependent existence and interaction.

The “give” is a beautiful moment for a trainer or behaviorist, and perhaps even more so for the dog. It creates the proper or natural psychological parameters and understandings in the dog for a stable and balanced existence forevermore. It is an escape from instability. The greatest challenge to achieving this “give” comes from the people who are too unaware or too uninterested or too unskilled to lead the dog in a truly stable dominant manner, and aggressively interfere with said stabilization process, they often do, consciously or not.

This entire “dog” scenario (behavioral pitfall, expression, and “therapeutic” intervention), also applies almost verbatim to people. I promise you that. Behavior is behavior is behavior. But, just like a dog, people may escape from such instability. It is a much more complicated endeavor to obtain a “give” from an adult person due to the glitching intricacies of the human psyche, but such a hope and epiphany is still possible. It is a viable reality.

If we are to increase the number of “gives” from/in humanity, if we are to decrease the widespread instability which is present within our numbers, then we must as a whole apply greater effort towards increasing our collective awareness, empathy, skill, and focus towards such intent.

Doing less through passive ease and/or the fostered apathy of delusion, distraction, and willful ignorance has lead to the pervasive instability and behavioral problems which are now all too commonly witnessed throughout the species of “man’s best friend” as well as humanity itself. 

We need to return collectively to openly acknowledging and embracing the grace and universal salvation which is present within the point of the “give.”

Cribb          2017

Millie and the Most Important Thing of All (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 177)

Millie (age 9) said “So, what is marking? How does someone mark a pet or a person?” and after a sparked involuntary chuckle, Jody’s body gradually recessed into the corner of the sofa and seemed to brace itself for whatever might come. As she did so, her expression whispered to me “well here we go you madman, this ought to be good. . . are you really going to have a college graduate level discussion with my baby girl on behavior and psychology?. . . I can’t even imagine how this is gonna go, but I guess I trust you, you crazed and certifiable lunatic.”

After a long and detailed conversation of what needed to be said and discussed to answer Millie’s question appropriately, she tilted her head to the side with playful comprehension and triumphantly inquired of me, if such a thing can be done, “So, you should never mark anything with fear, right?”

And my smile refused to be caged by any constraints as I replied “That’s right Millie. You got it, you got it! You never mark anyone or anything with fear. It is not easy and it can be very very hard not to accidentally do, but you should never ever mark anyone or anything with fear. That is the most important thing of all.”

Cribb          2017

The Pervasive Myth of Economic Gluttony vs. the Inescapable Context of Humanity (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 175)

The faulty assumption that scarcity-based economic thinking is somehow the de-facto human approach to questions of supply, demand, and distribution of wealth has mislead much anthropological, philosophical, and economic thought over the past few centuries. As economist John Gowdy explains, “‘Rational economic behavior’ is peculiar to market capitalism and is an embedded set of beliefs, not an objective universal law of nature. The myth of economic man explains the organizing principle of contemporary capitalism, nothing more or less.”

Many economists have forgotten (or never understood) that their central organizing principle, Homo economicus (a.k.a. economic man), is a myth rooted in assumptions about human nature, not a bedrock truth upon which to base a durable economic philosophy. When John Stuart Mill proposed what he admitted to be “an arbitrary definition of man, as a being who inevitably does that by which he may obtain the greatest amount of necessities, conveniences, and luxuries, with the smallest quantity of labour and physical self-denial,” it’s doubtful he expected his “arbitrary definition” to delimit economic thought for centuries. Recall Rousseau’s words: “If I had had to chose my place of birth, I would have chosen a state in which everyone knew everyone else, so that neither the obscure tactics of vice nor the modesty of virtue could have escaped public scrutiny and judgement.” Those who proclaim that greed is simply a part of human nature too often leave context unmentioned. Yes, greed is a part of human nature. But so is shame. And so is generosity (and not just toward genetic relatives). When economists base their models on their fantasies of an “economic man” motivated only by self-interest, they forget community—the all-important web of meaning we spin around each other—the inescapable context within which anything truly human has taken place.

Sex at Dawn

Ryan and Jethá          2010

Where Anger and Hatred Go (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 173)

Our psyche in daily life tries to give us a hint of where our shadow lies by picking out people to hate in an irrational way. Suppose there is a woman who seems to another woman too loose and too sexually active, and this latter woman finds herself thinking of this former woman a lot. In that case, the psyche (of the latter woman) is suggesting that part of her shadow, at least lies in the sexual area. She has to notice precisely whom she hates. That is the path of attention. Suppose that she hates the current president of the PTA; and if you ask her, she’ll say that the woman is fakey, can’t be trusted, is too successful, and so forth. The psyche might be telling her that part of her shadow lies in the power area. She has unused and unrecognized power impulses, which she has put into the bag. Otherwise there wouldn’t be such heavily emotional contact with that other person. So, following the path of attention, one notices where the anger goes, and precisely whom we become obsessed with. We become entangled with people who are virtually strangers. That’s odd. The metaphor is this: if we maintain eye contact with that person, we can damage him or her by our anger and hatred. If we break off eye contact and look down quickly to the right, we will see our own shadow. Hatred then is very helpful. The old tradition says that if a man loves God he can become holy in twenty years; but if he hates God he can do the same work in two years.

A Little Book on the Human Shadow

Robert Bly          1988

Edited by William Booth

Visceral Empathy (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 172)

If

your exuberant empathy

for one

is

guarded

by

vehement anger and resentment

towards another,

you are likely

hypnotizing yourself

into believing

that you are

much more

caring,

understanding,

and

loving,

than you truly happen

to

viscerally be;

you are drawing

 a line

in the sand

 with

your empathy

 where no line

should exist.

To limit

empathy

is to fake

such a grace

or

taint it with darkness

and

turn all of its light

into

a murky bastardized force

of

schizophrenic relativity and antithesis.

In

the highest spiritual elevation,

it

is

an

all or nothing

state

of

consciousness and being.

Cribb

2017

The Song of the Psyche; the Song of the Soul (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 171)

We are not being taught or encouraged to engage in real conversation with one another. Instead, we are being taught to have vocal exchanges of non-conversation, to bark at one another with a particular absence or lack of sustenance in what we present and how we respond. It is a portrayal of exuberance and eagerness in the desire to form union (whilst happily exchanging or sharing the energies of observation and experience), which is enthusiastically insincere in its advertised intent regardless of the pseudo-bonding emotional hype said intent, interest, and comradery rides upon. It is much “Hey, What’up?, How are you?, How’s it go’in?, What’s up bro?, (fistbump), How’s your family’n’em?, How’s everything?” about nothing. Most often, it is only the bottled up energy of an advertised existence which is incapable of achieving the stable state required for authentic self-aware output and accurate objective perception, drawn from the marketed hype and armchair quarterbacking of all of the mundane irrelevancies, occurrences, and distractions within the universe; it is the vocalization of undead maws, a chorus of soulless, segregated, and detached cacophonies.  It is worse, much worse, than the instinctual bonding which reflexively occurs in the realm of utter silence.

We are taught to pretend, to act, and to feign; we are taught to amuse and to be amused above all other perceptions of relevance and significance; we are taught to bark and laugh, to look beyond and askew, to jitteringly posture and not sit too still for too long; we are taught to annul the reality of ourselves and the reality of any mutual existence of higher meaning under some sort of unspoken indoctrinated commitment to the supposed beneficial preference of marketed and rewritten reality for all. Hear ye, hear ye! Disengagement and delusion, for all!

Reality and the graces within require respect if they are to deliver revelation and transcendence unto humanity. Respect requires a noble effort of the soul which surpasses the temptation and compulsion to subconsciously taint and twist all of our perceptions of mutual objective existence with our own isolated egocentric sin of doubt, fear, and selfishness. Noble effort is composed through the prioritizing of our own focus of empathic intent; and empathic focus of intent is only achieved by those willing to fully expose the tender sensitivities of their core essence and inner sanctum to the raw exoteric and indomitable landscape of independent coexistence and ceaseless vulnerability. Regressively, awareness is thus born and given its proper birth rite.

If we are not to rewrite and bastardize one another, ourselves, and even the realm of existence itself, if we are not to foster an oh so lethal and infectious madness within all of our hearts, minds, and souls, we must engage in awareness. Our fear, our petty amusement, and our overdominant ego, must let go for such awareness to thrive and flourish, and if we can do so, if we can become less than ourselves, and simultaneously also much, much greater than who and what we think we happen to be, we will come to crave and savor the ever-constant truth and reality of the independent and indomitable exoteric universe which is easily found once we are able to escape the prison of our own isolated mind.

This is the potential of earnest conversation and exchange; the gift of greater awareness, understanding, empathy, and union; upward transcendence. It should be the primary focus of our collective and individual humanity. Change everything, it would. To shun awareness and deny engagement with objective reality is a decision and action based in fear; and fear is always isolating and tortuous to those it possesses. Pretending to be someone else or not to be anyone at all during interaction, enclosing oneself in a buffer bubble of amusement and fun, or exsanguinating one’s soul out to the nervous vampiric energy of an overemotional horde, are all acts of fearful self-negation and they never will confront, nor can they ever overcome being possessed by fear.

Pretending, in all of its various forms, is chosen fearful non-existence and verbally, it expresses itself as chosen fearful non-conversation. The pretending must stop for individual and collective existences to start, for the hidden reality known deep within a man’s bones and humanities blood to obtain a peaceful synchronicity with the spiritual nature of his, and their, psyche. Real non-bastardized, non-marketed, non-tainted conversation, is the song of this psyche, the song of this soul.

We all need to stop pretending. We all need to talk to one another. Our souls all need to sing to one another and join in chorus together. This is the true path out of and away from fear; the path towards genuine individual and collective peace; the only path, the only one, that leads to union and transcendence.

Cribb          2017

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Answer (Love vs Sex 243)

 The Answer

The world is upside down. The answer is never fear. Never. The answer isn’t defensive posturing or preemptive attacks. It isn’t subjugation, deceptive manipulation, intentional misrepresentation, enablement, fostering of delusion, hoarding, war, addiction, organized religious placation, or any other form of over-dominance and pathological preparedness.
The answer is unrelenting love. It’s not a fairytale or something I say lightly or flippantly. I understand the cost and the risk involved in such love and those things simply put, just don’t fucking matter. They never really did. True love walks on water and over coals, it survives alone in the frigid cold and empty darkness, and it has not the slightest concern over the substantial cost of what it must pay or the risk it must endure to offer its energy so freely to another. Love dwells on hope and union and blissful happiness, not skeptical reservation, nor doubt, nor fear.

Love everyone and everything with all of your essence and all of your might, all of it and more, until the association creates unnecessary persistent suffering within your own soul. You must take the first step. You must make the offering, the sacrifice, until proven otherwise. It doesn’t make you a fool or an idiot. It makes you an angel blazing in the glory of God…..in the graceful glory of love.

At the point of persistent suffering you must remove the direct connection of your offering. Love’s duty is not to suffer at the hand or boot of another. It suffers enough in its own pure balanced state. To do otherwise, indicates a disrespect of yourself and the purity of your own love. Accepted persistent suffering is accepted distraction and detraction from the transcendence and implementation of love.

Walk away when you must, but never cut the love out of yourself. Don’t change your posture. Don’t change your approach. Don’t assume a pathological pattern in others will repeat, even if it might. It’s irrelevant. Your love should never stop, never be deterred, never withdrawn, even if it must be continually redirected to flow in some other direction.
When you obtain a truly pure state of love, you realize it applies to all of existence. You don’t get to pick and choose where your individual love goes. It flows freely to where it is needed, where it is sought, and where it will find its most magnetic bond of unity to ultimately achieve its greatest catalytic effect on existence.

We all live a life that is primarily based on fear or love. Most have deluded themselves into believing that they have chosen love as their guide stone, when in fact and in deed, the markers of their fear run rampant throughout their existence and their orbit. The behaviors of over-dominance and over-nurturing are prime indicators of those ruled or simply controlled by fear. Toggling back and forth between those behaviors is most often misinterpreted by people as some form of spiritual healing or spiritual growth, when in fact it only depicts the definitive absence of love.

When you truly become a creature of love through and through, the fear and anxiety and the swinging pendulums fade away. All that is left is love, and then you realize that you have no desire or time to waste on any of the other nonsense. It is an absolutely titillating and resounding epiphany. It is the moment of your true birth and the beginning of a beautiful existence.

Cribb          2016