The Poison and Wine of Laughter – Part 2 (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 200)

A much different energy, whether isolated or commingling in its flow, accompanies the willful humor which may be implemented to tickle our awarenesses.

I believe that this delicious and relaxing wine of laughter can only be properly served and shared in the gobleted prisms of sparkling and chiming clarity. Its consumption  ebbs and flows only amongst those who prefer the good hearted spirit of celebrated comradery, understanding and reflection for all; toasts and counter toasts of sloshing wine, teasing and playful contemplative joy, to dull the razor’s edge for another, as much or even more so, than for yourself. It is the polished reflection of an acknowledged and shared higher awareness that may only arise out of the union of genuine engagement in which we mutually decide to smile and dance and frolic despite whatever else may be.

This vino of laughter is a magical elixir of lightness which brings counterbalance to the heaviest awareness of the dark realms of existence by protecting the totality of focus via its gulping defiance of complete surrender to the piecemeal density of the gloom. Jovial levity is not denial of or withdrawal from that infinite gloom or its unrelenting presence which is woven into all things; it is only a refusal to sink into the fathomless darkness, a refusal to allow oneself to hopelessly suffocate in the pure nullifying oblivion which lurks in depths below. The jesters of chosen levity have learned to whimsically walk upon that malignant swell and  even dance upon its blackwater when they find a kindred spirit who dares to stride along with them in the same defiant movements. It is a defiant communion that may properly align and balance all of the lightness and darkness gracefully and cursedly beknown to those who possess a highly enlightened awareness.

It is a saving grace of higher transcendence for those who might easily go mad or succumb to suicide without its tickling touch of perpetual light, love, and perspective.

As amusement most readily aligns with psychopathy/sociopathy and apathy, willfully aware humor most readily aligns with empathy. Where psychopathy and apathy typically find themselves engaged in laughter that flows from the ridicule or harassment of another (over-dominance) or the passive aggressive patronizing of others (over-nurturing) for some ulterior motive, empathy typically engages in the stable and balanced satirical laughter of perception, comprehension, and the hope to bring about a better existence for all parties involved. The poison of amusement employed in psychopathy and apathy creates only a marketed pseudo-union of exchange which perpetuates the delinquency of  delusional perception and thus, potentiates isolated destabilization for all. On the other hand, or perhaps I should say instead, in the other glass, the wine of humor employed by empaths is a swirling interaction of genuine union and thus, its magical liquor bathes all in the warm glow of bonding synergistic stability.

When the laughter of willfully aware humor is faked, bastardized, exploited, and/or  weaponized it becomes a numbed and zombified sensation of the pseudo-reality of the living dead. It becomes amusement.

When we let go of our egos and acknowledge the imperfect and bemusing flaws, glitches, and defects of our existence and coexistence, we move beyond ourselves and connect our energy much more readily with all of the other creatures and forces within the realm of existence; we connect to the rest of existence not only through pattern recognition, alignment, consistency, and  the refined establishment of perfected order and precision of purpose, but also via the vast pervasive and permeating “dark energy” of confusing, puzzling, and often entertaining chaos; we exist and connect not piecemeal and fragmented, but in isolated union with our own multidimensionality and even more importantly, in the greater communal multidimensional union of higher transcendence.

If we are to truly live, we must love, and if we are to truly love, we must. . .we must,  laugh. May the wine of love and laughter flow through your veins forevermore.

Cribb          2017

 

 

 

The Poison and Wine of Laughter – Part 1 (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 199)

The difference between these two forms of laughter, better stated as amusement or willfully applied humor, might be the most tragically misunderstood and misinterpreted experience in the universe.

The Poison

Amusement has become the expected and the demanded law of the land by the herd. People declare their overt fondness and preference of friends and mates that keep them amused on a perpetual basis while they discount or minimize the need and importance of all of the person’s other qualities and character traits. Internet dating sites clearly display this knee jerk regurgitated “Isn’t it obvious, just like everyone else knows and says, duh?” proclamation; being amusing is the one trait cherished above all others and an absolute must have in any potential suitor interested in a possible relationship or even one simple encounter.

It is also a prime defining trait of psychopaths and the psychopathic manipulation of others. The uncanny ability of a psychopath to intoxicatingly bedazzle their “victims” into a giddy state of apathy and unconcern for reality, consequences, and ramifications, is well documented in the psychological and behavioral literature. Players seducing their prey for the night, slick willy businessmen sealing a deal, con-artists conning, heretical revival preachers enunciating and gesticulating their flock into hyper-emotional overload just prior to the passing of the collection plate, and corrupt politicians charming the masses into blind passionate obedience via the bombast and hyperbole of vitriol against a scapegoat, all exemplify amusement being implemented in its more malignant version.

A more benign form of amusement involves much less overt manipulation and a significantly lower conscious awareness of  intent by the implementer. This manifestation typically expresses itself via more basic, mundane, crude, unintelligent, and a lowest-common-denominator-bonding-experience that thrives and energizes itself on folly, ridicule, debasement, trash talking, or blubbering non-contemplative mesmerization. Fart jokes, burp songs, practical jokes emphasizing cruelty, engaging in trash talk with rival sports fans or about a previous romantic experience, and the subtle influence imposed on specific independent individuals by their larger group amusement state or more accurately, their larger group – pseudo, pretend, and feigned – amusement state, all exemplify this dynamic. Even the use of boring and uninteresting conversation, or numb and fake conversation, with only a subconscious intent to unconditionally ensnare another’s attention, is an example of this woeful benign amusement.

While the benign form of amusement may sometimes be harmless and/or a simple break from reality and contemplative awareness, typically both forms are dastardly and heinous. They both promote delusion via withdrawal and distraction from visceral perception and awareness; they negate reality, serving the same effect on people as that of an addict succumbing to a fix or a hit. But the drug of amusement is tragically and counterproductively swallowed under the satiating pretense of enlightenment and a desired interaction with the best aspects of life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Amusement is the doublespeak-doublethink bastardized child of, the Bizarro antivilian to, and the Dark Sided Sith, of aware and willfully applied  humor. Do not mistake this poison for wine, no matter the sparkle, spectacle, and charmful elegance of the decanter it resides within.

(continued and completed in Part 2)

Cribb          2017

Love Not of the Real Child (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 197)

It is one of the turning points in therapy when the patient comes to the emotional insight that all the love she has captured with so much effort and self-denial was not meant for her as she really was, that the admiration for her beauty and achievements was aimed at this beauty and these achievements, and not at the child herself. In therapy, this small and lonely child that is hidden behind her achievements wakes up and asks: “What would have happened if I had appeared before you, sad, needy, angry, furious? Where would your love have been then? And I was all these things as well. Does this mean that it was not really me you loved, but only what I pretended to be? The well-behaved, reliable, empathic, understanding, and convenient child, who in fact was a never a child at all? What became of my childhood? Have I not been cheated out of it? I can never return to it. I can never make up for it. From the beginning I have been a little adult.

The Drama of the Gifted Child: the Search for the True Self

Alice Miller          1994

Most Mouths (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 193)

One of the most bizarre and most difficult experiences I find myself continuing to endure in life is when a person seeks my help, knowledge, expertise, commentary, support, and/or advice in exuberant word, but only pseudo-action. I was in my mid-forties before I was finally able to accept that most people don’t even mean or know exactly what they actually say. Most mouths operate on an advertised level of nobility or expectation or polished distraction, while the actions of their host proceed unhindered and untethered in a whatever direction which is often completely antagonistic to their proclaimed desire. Is the pleading and bloviating of falsity a sincere attempt at the ideal, to strive to be better than the demon which pulls our visceral strings? Or is it just a barking mantra of parroted and regurgitated irrelevance, known all along by the speaker to be the penultimate tarbaby of destabilization which might be placed in the arms of the empath? Do these mouths cry out through the bars, as a prisoner might, from the hellish dominion of their maximum security psyches or do they just bullshit on a stage, seeking only power, glory, fixes, and dominance throughout the show of their singing and dancing? Obviously, whichever option rules, a neurotic glitch of the psyche is occurring during these discrepancies and it does appear that most are unconscious of their volatile inconsistencies between word and mouth. To push irrefutable awareness and acknowledgement with eyes stapled wide open on to them or not, that is the question. Who sincerely seeks shelter, aid, and healing, but can only handle so much in their fragility and who is just playing in the dark arts of emptiness and boredom? A terrified, bruised and broken Angel or a conniving Demon, spreading hell on Earth in every way imaginable? I suppose that at the end of all of these questions, none of the answers really matter. What matters most is my response and if I do the right thing, if I proceed as a creature of light, love, and stability. If I can do that, the rest will sort itself out as it should or as best it might, and the darkness that does prowl in its insatiable hunger will never be able to prey upon me.

Cribb          2017

The Two Poles of the False Self; The Root of much Mental and Behavioral Illness (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 190)

Paraphrased pretext note: According to Buddhist psychology, narcissism is an inherent consequence or side effect of maturation in human existence. It does not necessarily have to become a demon of future suffering, instability, and mental anguish, but most often it does. The adults suffering from such eventually become parents and pass this insufferable torch onto their children via their over invasiveness/intrusiveness or neglectful behavior in relation to their child’s true self. The child’s narcissistic anchor is unable to lock and hold on a stable parental entity in this dynamic and is thus unable to naturally autocorrect by withering away into oblivion from whence it came. Instead, the narcissistic anchor becomes a narcissistic “demon” possessing the child and that demon then assumes one of two possible versions, creating the shell of a false self around the child. Often, the child grows into an adult who continues to carry the demon for the rest of their life.

Cribb 2017

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Just as the philosophers of the Buddha’s day could be described as either eternalists (who believed in an immortal heaven, God, or real self) or annihilationists (who believed only in the meaninglessness or futility of life, so the human psyche finds comfort in alternatively embracing one or the other of these views. they are in fact, the two poles of the false self: namely, the grandiose self developed in compliance with the parent’s demands and in constant need of admiration, and the empty self, alone and impoverished, alienated and insecure, aware only of the love that was never given. The grandiose self, while fragile and dependent on the admiration of others, believes itself to be omnipotent or self-sufficient and so retreats to aloofness or remoteness, or, when threatened, clings to an idealized other from whom it hopes to retrieve its power. The empty self clings in desperation to that which it feels can assuage its hollowness or retreats to a barren void in which it is unapproachable and which reinforces the belief in its own unworthiness. Neither feels entirely satisfactorily, but to the extent that we are governed by the demands of the false self, we can envision no alternative.

thoughts without a thinker

Mark Epstein, M.D.          1995