The Point of the Give (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 179)

 

Pretext Note: This passage begins with observations specifically related to dog behavior, but evolves into a greater message regarding instability and behavioral disorders in people. I sincerely believe this message is of vital importance in regards to anyone who suffers from mental instability and I continue to believe that such instability is primarily a product of a behavioral disorder (a nurtured or learned disorder) as opposed to a pure genetic or medically inherited disease. The parallels of comparative behavior across species are extremely useful in illustrating this theory (and tangential associated theories) in cause, effect, and successful resolution.

A dog raised in a home environment without appropriate structure and boundaries is a dog that has been over-nurtured (spoiled) into believing that it is the master or ruler or supreme authority of all. In the reality of such a situation, that “all” for the dog only applies to its own household (own isolated pack), yet the dog has no profound reason or understanding to interpret its supreme authority of being any less authoritative anywhere outside of its own home (isolated pack). It cannot differentiate the “norm” of its isolated pack as being different from the “norm” of the very different greater world which exists outside of its isolated pack. The dog is thus significantly unsocialized and will be untempered in its accurate interpretation of relational behavior that varies from the over-nurturing it has learned to accept as all that is right and proper for itself.

If we assume that no fear has been added into this developmental equation by the owners, and we take the dog illustrated above and plop him on an exam room table, directly in front of a stable dominant authority figure, the dog will first attempt to flee. If not allowed to flee and not sappily “rescued” by his over-nurturing parents/family, and he is continued to be restrained by the stable dominant authority figure appropriately, the next move of the dog will be to do everything within his power to ignore and negate the reality of the stable authority figure. The dog will try to turn its body away as much as possible and will literally look down or from side to side to avoid having to acknowledge the authority figure who stands before it. If the stable authority figure is persistent enough, they will then repetitively and commandingly make the dog face themselves while making direct eye contact until avoidance of the posture and the glance is relinquished indefinitely. That is the point of the “give” by the dog which signifies that the dog has yielded its supreme authority to another “pack leader” who is more dominant and stable than itself; to a stable dominance which does not become an adversarial force or despotic ruler per se, but a rational and balanced reactive force of structure, accountability, accurate perception, and healthy non-codependent existence and interaction.

The “give” is a beautiful moment for a trainer or behaviorist, and perhaps even more so for the dog. It creates the proper or natural psychological parameters and understandings in the dog for a stable and balanced existence forevermore. It is an escape from instability. The greatest challenge to achieving this “give” comes from the people who are too unaware or too uninterested or too unskilled to lead the dog in a truly stable dominant manner, and aggressively interfere with said stabilization process, they often do, consciously or not.

This entire “dog” scenario (behavioral pitfall, expression, and “therapeutic” intervention), also applies almost verbatim to people. I promise you that. Behavior is behavior is behavior. But, just like a dog, people may escape from such instability. It is a much more complicated endeavor to obtain a “give” from an adult person due to the glitching intricacies of the human psyche, but such a hope and epiphany is still possible. It is a viable reality.

If we are to increase the number of “gives” from/in humanity, if we are to decrease the widespread instability which is present within our numbers, then we must as a whole apply greater effort towards increasing our collective awareness, empathy, skill, and focus towards such intent.

Doing less through passive ease and/or the fostered apathy of delusion, distraction, and willful ignorance has lead to the pervasive instability and behavioral problems which are now all too commonly witnessed throughout the species of “man’s best friend” as well as humanity itself. 

We need to return collectively to openly acknowledging and embracing the grace and universal salvation which is present within the point of the “give.”

Cribb          2017

Millie and the Most Important Thing of All (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 177)

Millie (age 9) said “So, what is marking? How does someone mark a pet or a person?” and after a sparked involuntary chuckle, Jody’s body gradually recessed into the corner of the sofa and seemed to brace itself for whatever might come. As she did so, her expression whispered to me “well here we go you madman, this ought to be good. . . are you really going to have a college graduate level discussion with my baby girl on behavior and psychology?. . . I can’t even imagine how this is gonna go, but I guess I trust you, you crazed and certifiable lunatic.”

After a long and detailed conversation of what needed to be said and discussed to answer Millie’s question appropriately, she tilted her head to the side with playful comprehension and triumphantly inquired of me, if such a thing can be done, “So, you should never mark anything with fear, right?”

And my smile refused to be caged by any constraints as I replied “That’s right Millie. You got it, you got it! You never mark anyone or anything with fear. It is not easy and it can be very very hard not to accidentally do, but you should never ever mark anyone or anything with fear. That is the most important thing of all.”

Cribb          2017

The Real Dog, Child, and Everything Else (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 176)

Pretext Note: I am a veterinarian and I have come to believe that comparative analysis of  the parallels between human to pet interaction, human to human interaction, and isolated human behavior to isolated animal behavior, is extremely helpful in illustrating and understanding the root causes of obsessive compulsive disease (drive disorders), mental instability (anxiety, fear responses, bully behavior), and egocentric projective delusion (the misunderstanding of the reality of the situation/disorder which prevents appropriate assessment and intervention/correction by external authorities as well as the victim themselves).

It is unfortunately true that many, if not the majority of, pet owners have little idea or minimal understanding about the genuine and undeniable behavior of their dog (pets in general). Pet owners are often masterful at creating and projecting intentions, motivations, and feelings onto their dog that simply have no foundation or basis in objective truth and behavioral analysis. I am not saying that it is easy for anyone to achieve the enlightened state of genuinely understanding behavior (over the projected distraction and confusing glitches in our own psyche). It took me a very long time (43-45 years in fact) that had to be coupled with an enormous amount of effort, awareness, intellect, observation, introspection, and a supreme desire to see beyond the pervasive satiating delusions that we all tend to be infected with from birth. It also took some luck at being fortunate enough to come into contact with someone who is exceptionally gifted in understanding behavior. My behavioral observations and conclusions have been challenged extensively by my own critical scrutiny and they stand solid and true in repetitive conclusion and application.

The most common response I receive from pet owners when I try to explain the true behavior of their dog is knee jerk denial and often scornful skepticism. Instead of listening and contemplating, being appreciative for the expertise of my words and explanation, most seem unsettled and agitated by the truth because it doesn’t fit in line with their preferred misperceptions and assumptions about their dog. In essence, the information I provide often shatters the illusion of what the owner has rewritten their dog to be for their own perceptional comfort. The rarer dog owner embraces the reality and revelation about their pet with appreciation and often good hearted humor. The more common dog owner honestly seems to dislike having to confront the reality of the situation even when such is required to address/treat a problem which they have come to me to inquire about.

This same misperceptive projecting glitch and egocentric delusional rewriting of another also occurs with many parents towards their children.

This same misperceptive projecting glitch and egocentric delusional rewriting of another (others) also occurs with many in regards to everything and everyone else.

It is always tragic, for such projective delusion blinds the perceiver from ever experiencing reality outside of their own head. Additionally, a dog, a child, a mate, a socioeconomic class, a foreign country, and whatever other entity, can never be seen, appreciated, understood, or stabilized/aided until such projective delusion and egocentric rewriting is shed from the perceiver’s soul.

Cribb          2017

Cleaving a Soul (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 174)

Our parents

rejected

the entirety

of

our innate existence

before

the miraculous wonder

of

our own conception,

cleaving our souls

into two or more,

before

we could even

become

one.

Cribb

2017

This statement is my version or evolution of an original quote by Robert Bly. His original quote reads “Our parents rejected who we were before we could talk.” The quote is made in reference to the “shadow” aspect of our divided soul/psyche. A short quote from A Little Book on the Human Shadow (1988) reads:

The drama is this. We came as infants “trailing clouds of glory,” arriving from the farthest reaches of the universe, bringing with us appetites well preserved from our mammal inheritance, spontaneities wonderfully preserved from our 150,000 years of tree life, angers well preserved from our 5,000 years of tribal life—in short, with our 360-degree radiance—and we offered this gift to our parents. They didn’t want it. They wanted a “nice girl or a nice boy.” That’s the first act of the drama.

Won’t You Not Play the Game with Me? (The Veterinarian)

For those who might be interested, this is a short poetic note about myself and some of the stressful forces which impact upon the practicing of my profession and the owning/operating of my veterinary hospital. I often fancifully refer to the hospital as the Castle. May these words be taken in the spirit of which they are offered; for greater understanding and the hope that we may all come together to work towards what is the most nurturing and best balanced system for all.

It disgusts me how much the corporate world stands in my shadow, deceptively and manipulatively sucking out almost all of the revenue I can generate in my trade by being a fair and ethical small business person. These entities figured out a long time ago how to put “face men” out there to disguise the intricate ponzi scheme of their diffuse market possession and “behind the curtain” price control they impose on all consumers. The current “capitalistic” system is designed for us to be nothing more than masked puppets for these juggernaut parasites. It equally disgusts me how much the government rapes me over and over in exponential fashion. The amount of taxes I pay for my income and property is egregious, insane, and unfair.

It would seem to me that the underlying lesson taught by both the government and the corporate world is that a man of independence and ethical preference is suppose to break himself of these tedious tendencies and desires. . . because, as they say, “you gotta make a living” or “you gotta make your fair share” or “you gotta play the game like everyone else, that’s just the way it is.” And sooner or later, maybe the system will take me out. I have been close a number of times, much closer than you probably believe, but if it happens one day, it just happens, because you see, I can’t play the game. A game that turns me into a relentless lying and tax evading prick or a bastardized up-selling unethical DVM corporate puppet that has to screw my customers over to generate a decent income for my effort and expertise, has at its victory the death of my honor, the loss of all of my integrity, and ultimately, the suicide of my humanity and the values of existence which make it worth experiencing. This I remind myself.

So, I just wrote a check to the United States Treasury for an absurd amount related to estimated taxes while I’m doing my best trying to get caught up on all of my other bills that cannot be paid from that extracted/allocated amount, but my day goes on with the Castle roof above my head and the Castle gardens flourishing all over the grounds. The magic is alive around here. . .you can feel it; it always holds up pretty good against the petrifying spell of money’s love potion and the wicked withering brought about by its whispered and temptable chants.

There is enough magic everywhere for everyone, but it isn’t to be found in a upsold suicidal game of plundering.

Won’t you not play the game with me?

Cribb          2017

Visceral Empathy (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 172)

If

your exuberant empathy

for one

is

guarded

by

vehement anger and resentment

towards another,

you are likely

hypnotizing yourself

into believing

that you are

much more

caring,

understanding,

and

loving,

than you truly happen

to

viscerally be;

you are drawing

 a line

in the sand

 with

your empathy

 where no line

should exist.

To limit

empathy

is to fake

such a grace

or

taint it with darkness

and

turn all of its light

into

a murky bastardized force

of

schizophrenic relativity and antithesis.

In

the highest spiritual elevation,

it

is

an

all or nothing

state

of

consciousness and being.

Cribb

2017

The Song of the Psyche; the Song of the Soul (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 171)

We are not being taught or encouraged to engage in real conversation with one another. Instead, we are being taught to have vocal exchanges of non-conversation, to bark at one another with a particular absence or lack of sustenance in what we present and how we respond. It is a portrayal of exuberance and eagerness in the desire to form union (whilst happily exchanging or sharing the energies of observation and experience), which is enthusiastically insincere in its advertised intent regardless of the pseudo-bonding emotional hype said intent, interest, and comradery rides upon. It is much “Hey, What’up?, How are you?, How’s it go’in?, What’s up bro?, (fistbump), How’s your family’n’em?, How’s everything?” about nothing. Most often, it is only the bottled up energy of an advertised existence which is incapable of achieving the stable state required for authentic self-aware output and accurate objective perception, drawn from the marketed hype and armchair quarterbacking of all of the mundane irrelevancies, occurrences, and distractions within the universe; it is the vocalization of undead maws, a chorus of soulless, segregated, and detached cacophonies.  It is worse, much worse, than the instinctual bonding which reflexively occurs in the realm of utter silence.

We are taught to pretend, to act, and to feign; we are taught to amuse and to be amused above all other perceptions of relevance and significance; we are taught to bark and laugh, to look beyond and askew, to jitteringly posture and not sit too still for too long; we are taught to annul the reality of ourselves and the reality of any mutual existence of higher meaning under some sort of unspoken indoctrinated commitment to the supposed beneficial preference of marketed and rewritten reality for all. Hear ye, hear ye! Disengagement and delusion, for all!

Reality and the graces within require respect if they are to deliver revelation and transcendence unto humanity. Respect requires a noble effort of the soul which surpasses the temptation and compulsion to subconsciously taint and twist all of our perceptions of mutual objective existence with our own isolated egocentric sin of doubt, fear, and selfishness. Noble effort is composed through the prioritizing of our own focus of empathic intent; and empathic focus of intent is only achieved by those willing to fully expose the tender sensitivities of their core essence and inner sanctum to the raw exoteric and indomitable landscape of independent coexistence and ceaseless vulnerability. Regressively, awareness is thus born and given its proper birth rite.

If we are not to rewrite and bastardize one another, ourselves, and even the realm of existence itself, if we are not to foster an oh so lethal and infectious madness within all of our hearts, minds, and souls, we must engage in awareness. Our fear, our petty amusement, and our overdominant ego, must let go for such awareness to thrive and flourish, and if we can do so, if we can become less than ourselves, and simultaneously also much, much greater than who and what we think we happen to be, we will come to crave and savor the ever-constant truth and reality of the independent and indomitable exoteric universe which is easily found once we are able to escape the prison of our own isolated mind.

This is the potential of earnest conversation and exchange; the gift of greater awareness, understanding, empathy, and union; upward transcendence. It should be the primary focus of our collective and individual humanity. Change everything, it would. To shun awareness and deny engagement with objective reality is a decision and action based in fear; and fear is always isolating and tortuous to those it possesses. Pretending to be someone else or not to be anyone at all during interaction, enclosing oneself in a buffer bubble of amusement and fun, or exsanguinating one’s soul out to the nervous vampiric energy of an overemotional horde, are all acts of fearful self-negation and they never will confront, nor can they ever overcome being possessed by fear.

Pretending, in all of its various forms, is chosen fearful non-existence and verbally, it expresses itself as chosen fearful non-conversation. The pretending must stop for individual and collective existences to start, for the hidden reality known deep within a man’s bones and humanities blood to obtain a peaceful synchronicity with the spiritual nature of his, and their, psyche. Real non-bastardized, non-marketed, non-tainted conversation, is the song of this psyche, the song of this soul.

We all need to stop pretending. We all need to talk to one another. Our souls all need to sing to one another and join in chorus together. This is the true path out of and away from fear; the path towards genuine individual and collective peace; the only path, the only one, that leads to union and transcendence.

Cribb          2017