Thank You for your Enrollment in our Life-Sucking Apathy Torture Plan (Warrior Poet Mental Yoga 146)

Pretext Comment: I am a Veterinarian who is currently witnessing corporate America invade and remake our industry into the same immoral pillaging demon that they turned human health care into many moons ago…and it is more than obvious that it has nothing to do with Government interference, now as it was originally then. This wayed on my mind heavily during my supremely blissful and oh so brief engagement with my open healthcare insurance enrollment that I was forced to be drawn and quartered with yesterday. My original thoughts and obscure humor regarding these matters follow. Laughing at the insanity is surely part of it’s cure.

After navigating once again through the life-sucking process of deciphering the misleading fine print of various levels of denying care Health Care Plans and tolerating unavoidable misdirectional pisspoor customer service, including being endlessly accosted by the demonic gatekeeper of automation and hangup/disconnect hell, not to mention, being blessed by the ridiculous required financial raping of being mandatorily charged a month prior to the beginning of whatever service will actually be rendered, I would just like to remind anyone stupid enough to read this of 3 points;

1) The insurance company created this tortuous, complicated, confusing, outsourced, automation plagued, fineprint activity, all on their glorious own. This absurd process, that I just went through and barely managed to survive with my somewhat of an above average intellect, is a quagmire and tarbaby of the worst intent and the most obscure clarity imaginable.

2) The cost of Veterinary Medicine is currently being exponentially raised right under your noses, as the true quality declines, by numerous sly, parasitic, and super-misleading-marketing, corporate entities who are invading the field. They are selling you a lot of glittering shit and setting their hooks solidly, while making you feel all nice and cozy and special with their psychopathic pseudo-charm lullaby. It ain’t be the government that be bastardizing the hell out of veterinary medicine and that will most assuredly continue to aggressively generate super-duper-revenue off of your love for your pet. You ain’t seen noth’in yet in regards to Fido’s future bills.

3) The most real and polite and dare I say organic part of all this madness, was when I spoke to one particular customer service person on the phone. I don’t know where she was sitting, but I would lay money down on the country of India or Pakistan. She actually spoke to me like a real person and appeared to be genuinely interested in helping to end my Blue Cross Blue Shield torture session. Those damn foreigners, so lazy, and just so damn unAmerican.

Cribb          2016

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