Love vs Sex 153 (#16 on Tantric Sex)

Kissing is truly a wonderful and sensual art, and can become a language in itself, an important aspect of foreplay and lovemaking. It evokes the sexual response at a deep level. Kissing, being joined at the mouth, is the ultimate intimacy of face-to-face and eye-to-eye. It is an extremely intimate gesture and often a person will think once about making love, but twice about kissing them. It is as if we consider kissing more sacred than sex. If we are in love, as we make love, then there is usually the overwhelming wish to kiss each other. It is a profound sharing of energy, a drinking through the sensuality of the mouth, and through this the bodies connect in intimate circular fullness.

However, in kissing as in lovemaking, once again we do too much. Relaxation is the biggest aid to kissing. Relax the mouth and jaw and especially relax the lips, allowing them to be soft and receptive. Usually in kissing we purse the lips into a tight rosebud and then kiss the other person on their tightened lips very quickly. This is not really a genuine kiss, one where there is a sharing of energy through the mouth because the lips are too tense. Lips need to be relaxed and pliable, yielding and responsive. In kissing, bring the lips together very very slowly; let them join softly, be elastic, melt into each other. Maintain this juicy contact allowing them to answer each other in a succulent dance.

The Heart of Tantric Sex

Diana Richardson          2003

Cribb Comment: In disclosure, I prefer sloppy wet sensual kisses that undulate back and forth from the extremely soft and gentle to the more aggressive penetrations associated with tongue acrobatics. I will also throw in a little nibbling from time to time in what I believe to be in appropriate gentle measure and proper frequency. This all being said, to acknowledge that some may not prefer my form of kissing or they may find the grace of my kisses too aggressive or simply distasteful. Such differing preferences are completely understandable. But, I have noted in my experiences, much to my dissatisfaction and unease, a few tight lipped women, rigid and fairly aggressive in their proclaimed rules of kissing, who enforced only an absolute minimal, and dare I say dry, lip engagement. I have always believed this correlated more with their psyche than their actual preference of sensuality. And of further possible interest is also the seeming correlation of kissing compatibility equaling sexual compatibility. Those of uptight oral lips also seem to suffer from “uptight” genital lip syndrome too, if you know what I mean. I continue to find it very interesting that so many people must kill the softness, sensuality, and union potential that is obviously possible in the sexual experience. The melting and melding together have always seemed so natural to me. While most talk so much about porn, and “getting off” as much as possible, and their adulation for their own sex toys, and their own sex appeal towards the world, it is telling that the majority of these people can’t even bring themselves to truly kiss another human being. Such a fact would seem like a very important thing to acknowledge and address. That is, of course, unless you were hiding from that fact.


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