Inevitable Extractions of Certain Selfs and the Occasional Crazy Ass Dream of Awakening – 3

At first glance, she thought they might be Angels or maybe even Demons. What had given her that impression? Had she seen the glimmer of wings for the briefest breath when the illumination had released itself? Had she seen auras or halos or some ripple of energy radiate from their essence during her first attempt at recognition? Had she witnessed a simultaneous landing of sorts in the fraction of a second… “plop goes the angels or the demons” right in front of her at the speed of light? Was time somehow undulating in unbelievable flip flop ways or was it just her perplexed perception? She doubted what she thought she had glimpsed, but still remained unable to dismiss it as pure delusion.

The present seemed to calm from the glitching past, and it portrayed two normal, though somewhat indistinct entities who sat facing one another. Another undeniable impression overcame her that they had sat across from one another just so for untold millennia. She felt like a helpless naive newborn babe as she looked at them and realized this. The figures seemed oblivious or callous to their candelabric exposure and their mutual posture hinted at the potential disregard for all outside the realm of their direct attention and exchange with one another. Yet, a murmur still emerged from their world and it crept outward in such expanding waves of force and vibration that it heralded a need to be heard…..perhaps, a need to be heard and even more so, to be understood. The murmur grew in intensity as her focus remained centered upon them, but why was her focus now specifically set only upon them? Why had she found it so compelling to center on these two figures and then so damn near impossible to pull or shift away. She had no doubt that she was unable to reclaim her attention from them.

Perhaps, it was the gravity of some instinctual juvenile wonder that she had not as of yet cut out of her expanding awareness or maybe is was just her pure unadulterated boredom with all else that appeared more mundane and normal within eyesight and earshot. Whatever the snare or the treat, for her it was like she had unintentionally stumbled into this dream or fallen down this rabbit hole all alone, only to chance upon two figures who happened to be sitting across from one another……….arguing? Was that what they were doing? Their banter was becoming more and more decipherable to her and as it did so, its nature revealed itself to be exaggeratingly antagonistic. Their manners, phrases, movements, and expressions towards one another looked like jousting between clowns. They pranked with dark jokes, quick witted satire, perpetual baiting, and every other sort of impish behavior one might imagine. She watched as their arguing or debating or discussing or jousting or whatever the hell it was, swung this way, then that, round and round, zig and zag. She began to listen quite intently to their verbal sparring, trying to understand what subject or topic or relevance prompted such endless discussion amongst themselves. And though for the most part it seemed they might even not know that she was there watching, once or twice, she was sure that she caught a brief peripheral glance or a very short-lived sly grin, aimed inadvertently in her specific direction.

Part of her wanted to flee quickly and the direction of her escape was of no concern, but some other part, a deeper less predictable and less understood part, held her still. And in the silence of her stillness, the cadence of the White and Dark banter transformed from something alien and alarming in her assumption to something oddly cradling and comforting in it’s impact upon her. It was almost like her fear had become scared of her stillness…and in her present environment that catalyst had tilted some internal equation away from that fear and much more so in the direction of a cautious, but nonetheless, curious respect. That evolving orientation brought with it a progressive shimmer that swam upon all things, painting them in its flow with a transparency that she had never ever seen before.

To be continued…

Cribb          2014

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