Compliance with Style and Laughter, even when it really doesn’t mean a Damn Thing

Note: This is my non-fictional response to a Workers Comp Insurance Company that performed an assessment of Veterinary Care Center to ascertain what safety risks or safety compliance issues might exist, and thus, need to be addressed. This assessment appears to have been performed by this company because of a “slip and fall” accident that occurred at VCC previously. Some specifics of that “slip and fall” will be revealed below. The previous Workers Comp Co. jacked our rates up after settling with the “fallee” because despite the clear facts, it was simply cheaper for that company to settle with the “fallee” than to defend the truth and my honor. So, as some ignore reality, I must comply with silly lists that will never be long enough or contain enough clauses to protect my honor or liability, but I can do it with style and make myself laugh in the process. May you laugh as well, whether it be from humor or the absurdity of it all.

To whom it may concern;

I believe that I have addressed all of “your” concerns as listed in the Oct 17, 2013 letter that was sent from ABC America to Veterinary Care Center.

First, I do want to bring something to your attention that I believe your “Loss Control Department” is not aware of or has chosen to ignore. Absolutely, none of your recommendations have or had anything to do with, or would have prevented the “2012 slip and fall incident due to a wet floor” that was referenced in your letter. The employee that suffered from the “2012 slip and fall incident due to a wet floor” had a pre-existing knee condition that she had previously and openly discussed with multiple employees at Veterinary Care Center, as well as her inability to afford the medical care that was required to have such a condition evaluated and treated. Of note, is the additional fact that in the week prior to our pre-existing knee condition “claim winner” suffering from the hazardous workplace conditions at Veterinary Care Center and “falling immediately next to a bright yellow mop bucket, tattooed with a bright red label warning of caution”, she had received a verbal warning that her work ethic was poor and that she was facing impending termination if her work ethic did not improve. While, none of your bullet points would have prevented this event in any way, what would have appropriately and rightly balanced this employees’ sham act, would have been the previous worker’s comp insurance agency, defending me via the actual facts related to the “case”, instead of choosing settlement because it was more financially prudent for their interests. So, while I attempt to comply with your list, forgive me if I laugh a little bit in the process. When truth and defending such yields to the ease of allowing fiction to rule simply because it is more financially advantageous to your company, no list or employee handbook will ever be long enough to protect me.


We have 3 employees. I am directly involved with the supervision of all employees. Employees are instructed to use common sense relating to all of the categories listed. If an employee fails to display enough common sense or aptitude to protect them or maintain the safety of other employees, they will be terminated. In any matter that an employee questions or perceives involving a possible risk, they are specifically instructed to speak with me directly before proceeding. The staff is prohibited from any activities I perceive involve a high level of risk.

The staff is made aware of your extensive safety library at www.ABCAMERICA.JOKEcom should they want further training in common sense and a different, objective source for safety considerations and recommendations.


We do not have regular (or recent) accidents to have regularly scheduled meetings about. We have 3 employees. The “slip and fall” referenced above has been discussed in great detail with my entire staff. The staff understands completely that the previous worker’s comp insurance company totally sold out and did not represent my interests. The entire staff knows that the “claim winner” was a player who orchestrated events to my detriment and her benefit. The entire staff understands that the “accident” was a joke.

The staff understands they are perpetually suppose to report any thing pertaining to anything or any event on the hospital grounds or in the hospital that could lead to an accident or a problem with safety.


Motor vehicles are very rarely used pertaining to clinic business. The driving records of all employees are consistent with responsible individuals that drive safely. Employees with a questionable safety driving record will never be involved with operating a motor vehicle for company business.


Henceforth, no employee who operates a motor vehicle in the very rarely performed task of company business, may use a cell phone in any manner whatsoever while operating the vehicle. There are no exceptions to this rule.


All employees are to wear footwear that is in good general condition and good tread condition. All employees are to check their footwear daily to assure that their footwear remains in good general condition and in good tread condition. If any footwear theorized to be slip resistant is found in actuality to be less than slip resistant by an employee, said footwear shall be replaced by the employee with footwear that is in actuality slip resistant.


Your picture of the dog bathing tub (referencing this concern), clearly shows a slip resistant rubber floor mat sitting in the tub. The mat is normally kept in the tub unless a bath is being performed so as to not create a tripping hazard for someone who is just walking by the tub. The floor next to the tub and within the kennel is to be kept as dry as is feasible at all times. Any item creating any sort of a tripping risk is to be removed immediately from any floor. See your picture.


The fire extinguishers (2) have just been serviced and have been deemed adequate for a period of one year. Continued annual inspection will occur. Appropriate tags are attached to each extinguisher. See attached picture.


All items have been removed from at least 36” from the front of the electrical panels to assure for rapid access should an emergency develop. This area will be maintained as such. See attached picture.


All gasoline containers (oil containers, etc.,) have been moved to the exterior of the building. Some lawn equipment is being stored in one closed room within the clinic that no one except Dr Cribb is allowed to enter. Employees are not to breathe gasoline fumes or attempt to ignite these same fumes at any time, even when the fumes are outside of the building. Employees are not to approach with a 10 foot radius of me while I am mowing the lawn with the lawn mower because they might trip on whatever substrate is under their footwear and fall under the mower, to lose life or limb. See attached picture.


We do not have a ladder. We do have a step stool that I just inspected and found to be structurally sound. I will continue to inspect this step stool monthly. It will be culled should its structural integrity become compromised.


All employees are advised to not stand with both feet at the same level for too long a period because this will lead to excessive static loads upon their legs. Employees are instructed to sit down if they feel like their legs are too fatigued. No employees are currently complaining about this issue being an issue and no employees are currently requesting anti-fatigue mats.


Jeff Cribb DVM

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